A welcome contribution....

I'm back… just when you thought your guest contributor had deserted and left Megan to come up with ideas on her own (and lets face it the blog has been a bit dull lately) I have returned to get you all thinking!

OK so here's a question… why do some truly awful human beings end up with partners, while other wondrous creatures (and I can think of plenty off the top of my head) stay perpetually single? I am sure you have all seen those couples walking down the street with one partner sniping and griping at the other who is just nodding and looking all hen-pecked and resigned. What has the pecker got that makes the peckee stay? Is it to do with good lucks? Charm? Wit? Or is it just plain old confidence?

My sense after throwing this question around for a month or two is that it appears to be about confidence. If you are happy with yourself, no matter how nasty or unfortunate looking that might be, you are much easier to be around than someone who is insecure, or constantly worried about weight/hair/fashion type issues. There is also that whole power of positive thinking thing too - I mean if you assume that someone won't ever leave or hurt you then maybe the odds are better that they won't. Worrying that someone might cheat, for example, has never once stopped someone doing it in my experience.

And while we are on the subject of cheating - is it ever OK to cheat? Is there ever an excuse? And what is it about getting older that makes things that were very clear just a few years back (its never OK - how hard is it to end one relationship before starting the next) suddenly not so black and white?

Before you get burned yourself, and often even after the first big burn, you have the sense that there is hope for some big romance in your future and it will be with a perfect guy (or girl of course), and that they will be good to you and care about you and you will have fun together. It is some sort of unwritten rule that they will not be the kind of person who lies or cheats or hurts people, and they won't have major baggage or children or a wife. After you have had a couple more burns it sometimes ends up that you think everyone is the kind of person who lies or cheats or hurts someone and that leaves you in a rather sad place. Still hopeful that that nice guy (or girl) is out there and fingers crossed that when you meet them they are not married… with children.

Well there you have it folks - a few things to think about while you peruse Megan's vision in lilac - answers to the many questions posed, or suggestions to break out of the negative vision of relationships your guest contributor has on a postcard to the usual address.

Til next time...